Re: wingy daughter and mindees?
put your foot down.
when you ask DD to get something and mindee runs stop the mindee and tell him you asked Dd not him but remember then to ask him to do something too.
blocking the doorway is a hazzard, do role play - fire evactuation, if the door is blocked what will happen? try to get him to realise that he must never block the door as it may stop you all get out safely (without scaring or threatening lol but you know what I mean hopefully).
aim to do more activities to keep him distracted from wanting to "be a pain" to your DD. when he reaches to grab your hand as your Dd does just lift your hand higher so he cant reach then take your DD's hand and smile sweetly.
as his attitude changes reward him with stickers, verbal praise or even a certificate for caring and sharing or whatver you feel will fit his behaviour.
as he learns her moaning and winging will be reduced, it may not go totally its a girl thing lol (personal experience) but its hard to make a 4 year old understand that a 3 year old is to be ignored when seeking attention (ugh does that make sense?).
ok I'm waffling but hoping I've offered a little help there.
Busy losing the will to live mwuahahahaha!
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