should i give notice

[emmadines]

i dont know what to do..... i don't know if you remember a problem i had between mindee and my 4 year old, always seeking a reaction and mainly aimed at my 4 year old daughter. today he had been on top form, hes thrown tin cars at another minded child, constantly winding my DD up, taking things she wants, getting on the bike she wants and then getting off it then calling her to get on it and jumping off it, he seems very jealous of any attention she gets, no matter how Small. Its been commended that if he does anything thats horrible to my DD then to walk up to her and make a fuss of her ie: if he pushes her out of the way to get the item shes after then walk up to her and say "***** thats not very nice. come on ****, lets go do something fun" this prob sounds really petty, ive just had enough. I cant wait till I know whether I will get on this course... and then i can move on. ive had enough of having to put my kids after the minded one ie time, effort etc. oo and behaviour - always trying not to tell the minded kids off too much, having to buckle even more onto mine etc..

now I have a head ach, Im tired and I still have paperwork to do, a house to clean and a very stroppy hubby - I need a new job

[sandy64]

only you can decide hun but sounds like your having a really bad time what about getting a baby or a lo older maybe that would be easier? on your family its so hard when your own get bullied its not the easiest job is it maybe terminate contract and have a change most lo are nice hope it works out for you

[moljak]

If it's just this child thats spoiling your job then you need to decide whether it's worth it.My kids come first and if a mindee doesn't fit into my day then so be it.Might sound harsh but I want my kids to have a happy childhood which is why I'm working from home.

[Ripeberry]

Too true. If the minded child does not fit then you should put your own familly first. Hope you find a nicer child

[angeldelight]

What did you decide to do Emma ?

Angel xx

[miffy]

Don't know if you've made a decision but put yourself and your own family first. I think you'll be happier then.

Miffy xx

[The Juggler]

hope you are OK this is hard because you can almost start to dislike the child (even though it's his behaviour that is hard and not his fault).

If you are feeling like this then keeping him is not going to do you any good and neither will it with the child because he will sense how you feel towards him (I am in no way having a go as I've been there and it's really hard). But, if he senses you feel negative towards him and he doesn't feel accepted his self-esteem will start to suffer and his behaviour will probably get worse.

Sometimes a change is what's needed to 'break the cycle' of this type of behaviour.

Only you can decide though hon.x

[mushpea]

I know how hard work this is because i have a similar situation between my son and a mindee although they are older, my son is 9 and mindee 6, it is very frustrating and hard work some days and i feel that all i have done is tell them both off all day. the mindee now has an awful habbit of telling on my son every 5mins then grining when i tell him off, so the other day i told my son of for whatever it was then turned to they mindee and told him off for grining too which he wasnt impressed about, now when he tells on my son i tell the mindee that its for me to watch my son and decide whats wrong.
anyway if the chld gets of and offers your child the toy why not praise the mindee then when he jumps back on the toy tell him its not nice and make him get off so your daughter can get back on.
it is v. hard work and if you can afford to loose the mindee then do it, i personaly cant afford to and i do acutualy like the mindee (when hes behaving!), i think for my two its more that they are like brothers cause the mindee is here every day b4 and after school and all day in the hols so hes like part of the funiture really lol

[emmadines]

I know how hard work this is because i have a similar situation between my son and a mindee although they are older, my son is 9 and mindee 6, it is very frustrating and hard work some days and i feel that all i have done is tell them both off all day. the mindee now has an awful habbit of telling on my son every 5 mins then grining when i tell him off, so the other day i told my son of for whatever it was then turned to they mindee and told him off for grining too which he wasnt impressed about, now when he tells on my son i tell the mindee that its for me to watch my son and decide whats wrong.
anyway if the chld gets of and offers your child the toy why not praise the mindee then when he jumps back on the toy tell him its not nice and make him get off so your daughter can get back on.
it is v. hard work and if you can afford to loose the mindee then do it, i personaly cant afford to and i do acutualy like the mindee (when hes behaving!), i think for my two its more that they are like brothers cause the mindee is here every day b4 and after school and all day in the hols so hes like part of the funiture really lol

Hi, I like the mindee, he has so much personality, prob too much for his age, and when they get on they are great and the get on very well, but when they dont its awful. I haven't done anything with a decision yet as Im waiting on an application which would mean that I have to give notice anyway. also I dont want to just give up on him because I cant cope with this behaviour and jealousy against my own daughter, I want to beat this (not the child) and teach him to understand that his behaviour isnt acceptable, maybe to find a happy medium. if that makes sense. I will give it another 4 weeks to see if I can get him under control, My DD is starting to walk away from him when he starts which has ment he has moved onto the next child (not to the degree that he was with DD but I am dealing with it) I spoke to an x health visitor and she advised me to make a fuss of the one he is behaving badly towards and reward mindee when he is actually being good! she also advised me, for my own health and stress levels and that of my own family, that I really need to consider terminating contract